It is common for teenagers to have challenging dynamics with their parents. The teenage years are when young adults start developing a true sense of self and differentiating from their parents. They may feel like their parents are embarrassing or that one parent is too strict. They may also blame one parent for the current family dynamics.
If parents separate or divorce, children may have strong preferences regarding who they live with and how much time they spend with either parent. For example, a teenager might insist that they don’t want to see one parent.
So, what happens if a teen refuses to see one of their parents when a parenting plan is in place?
Teenagers do not have control over parenting time matters
Parents may sometimes feel like their teenagers run the house, but that isn’t true from a legal perspective. Parents have the final legal say in everything from what health care their children receive to what extracurricular activities they enjoy and what time the children spend with each parent.
Parents with a parenting plan both have an obligation to uphold court orders to the best of their abilities. They should encourage their children to spend time with the other parent and avoid actions that could damage the parent-child relationship.
If a teenager is not cooperating, parents should address the issue and should make every reasonable effort to get a child to comply. Ignoring a court order, even if it’s because of the child’s preferences, can lead to legal actions to enforce it. New Hampshire courts may:
- Find a parent in contempt
- Grant the parent who hasn’t seen their teenager extra time to make up for missed time
- Permanently change the existing parenting schedule
Generally, teenagers can only refuse to see one parent once they turn 18 and are no longer subject to the Court’s authority.
What can I do if my teen still won’t go?
If your teen refuses to see their other parent, document your efforts to comply with the order and notify the other parent of the issue in writing. Talk to your child to understand his/her concerns and consider counseling if there are deeper issues to address.
Your legal obligation is to uphold the court’s orders, but open communication and protecting your child’s well-being are also key.